Moved

I’ve Moved.

If you have my email feel free to drop a note.

Cheers!

Blither Moment

Lately I have surprised myself with an astonishing ability to act super spastically blond.
So Yes, I mean more so than before.

Is the aging factor a contributor?
Does wisdom not come with age? I can’t remember.

Could my medication have a side effect of super enabling blondish behavor?
Maybe? How many times did I take my pills today?

Countless times I’ve argued with myself if I’ve actually taken my medication. A month of daily arguments with pill bottles and you too will find yourself filling a weekly pill holder. Problem with that is you have to remember what day it is. I’ve accidentally taken Thursdays on Wednesday. Calling your pharmacist and explaining how you managed to double up your meds is more than embarrassing.

Examples of my blondness…

On Saturday DnaDbl, Mr W, Mr B, and Me were all out gambling happily on poker slots. We’re having a grand old time absorbed quietly in our money greedy “sluts”. Now also keep in mind I hadn’t had a drop to drink- Freaky I know. So this is full on blond.
A man comes up behind me and quietly says, “Hi“.
Umm.. Ok I think, “Hi“. And I turn back around to ignore him.
He continues standing there and he ask, “How is everything tonight“?
WTF! I get my “I’m With Someone” attitude on.”My husband and I are having a great time. Thank You“. Again I turn around to ignore him.
The guy still doesn’t leave. Instead he says, “Can I get you some change“?
What? That is the strangest question. Now why in the world… “No. Why“?
“You hit the service button, Ma’am“.
*Blink*
*Blink*
That is when DnaDbl went into a fit of hysteria.

Dna probably gets most of my Blitherness blond moments…

DnaDbl and I are on the phone discussing our Nephew’s birthday.

Me: Oh Hey, It’s Nate’s Birthday next week. Don’t Forget.
Dna: Yeah- He likes Mail.
Me: Mail?
Dna: Yeah Mail.
Me: I’ve never heard of it.
Dna:Yes, You have.
Me: No. Never.
Dna: In the Box?
Me: No. Never seen it.
Dna: YES YOU HAVE!
Me: What store is it at?
Dna: Are you kidding?
Me: No, Why?
Dna: I have to go.
Me: Huh? Are you gonna get it for him?
Dna: *Click*

For some reason I thought “Mail” was a toy. Blither’s are easily confused with random statements.
My family still chuckles over “Mail”.

I feel as if the blond has breached my brilliance.

Yesterday it took me a whole hour to realize my daughter and I were not texting each other the same messages at almost the same time, but that I had plugged my own number under her name in my new phone. Brilliantly wicked joke to play on someone else. When you play it on yourself- Very twilight-zone’ish.

Gosh! I do have to say I make me laugh..

Cheers!

Crap it’s Tuesday

My DnaDbl and her Mr W are always too much fun!

Dna won a royal flush- Woo!

2 days was not enough time to hang with our favorite couple.

I never got my camera out. Yeah. What the heck? I have a few cell pics to upload, but still.

I can’t believe it’s Tuesday.

Already!

Crap!

Where is my week going?

I have a million chores to catch up on and 2 million errands to run.

I’m so tired.

Motivation is at a Zero.

Ok Ok.. I need to go find my giddy up.

Hopefully it’s in that coffee pot over yonder.

Cheers!

Blither Hearts Girls

So..

I was trying to find a picture of Tami, my DnaDbl, to post.

I found that.

That’s Tami and Jen. Last August at my house. Jen’s my bestest best best friend ever! She’s also Dna’s bestest best best friend ever too- Since like ever. We’re talking like we met at age 2. At the time we didn’t realize this would be a long life commitment, but Pfft who would know at 2?

Anywho.. The picture cracked me up. And then…
I was like…

*Sniffle*

I miss them.

*Gulp*

Tissue?

(We all know that Blither’s don’t cry. Unless I’ve had way to much vodka or some dumbass commercial comes on.)

So..

What’s My point?

Really there is one.

But I’m so freaking tired. I’ve been getting the guest room ready, scrubbing, ironing sheets, getting special meals planned….

A special weekend trip to Viva Las Casa Tatah’s (That’s My house in Vegas) with DnaDbl & Mr W!

No Jen, But she promises me she’ll come sometime soon.

I am soooo damn excited to see my sister I can hardly wait! I haven’t seen her since December 9th. I KNOW! December 9th. WOW! A long time for me to go.

OK.. I probably won’t be around until Monday with lots and lots of pictures of my weekend fun with Ms DnaDbl.

Cheers All!

Wii Wii Wii

I hurt myself yesterday.
Jen, my BF, calls it Wii Arm.

I dreamt about Mii last night- Wara.
And Mr B- Wob.

…Wii Weally Wicked!…

Since I accidentally bumped into our Wii yesterday (and bought it) I’ve been using a lot of “Wii” speak.

Wii-Wachtler’s (Dna’s Fam)
WiiDrew (Andrew, my Son)
Wii-A (Lela, my Daughter)
Whamii, Pronounced Wham-MII. (That would be Ms Dna, Tami’s new name- I created it- She has no clue)
Must not forget the Dogs, Tink and Buster- Wiinker and Wuster.
Wii Words
Love’em!

I didn’t intend to buy a Wii yesterday.
Actually I only wanted to go and buy an oversized can of semi-crappy coffee from Costco for a decent price (for the quantity)… Von’s was all out of reasonable prices on their ground semi-grade crappy coffee. I also needed a half gallon of vanilla creamer.

When I walked in I saw 20 Wii’s. Twenty.

I picked one up. I thought, “This must be accessories“. Two more people came over and picked theirs up and put them in their giant sized charts.

Wii?

I read the tag. Console, Stand, Blah Blah Don’t WiiCall, Wii Sport, Wii Whatever, 2 WiiMotes, ….

I FOUND MY WII!!!!

Now this is the really sad part. Mr B was in a meeting. I didn’t want to go and plop down $350 for something unless he said… Sure.. Buy it. Even if we had been searching since mid-march for our Wii. We had kinda given up. So I aimless walked Costco with my creamer, coffee, Wii, for over an hour until he called me back. I hate Costco. The store stresses the fuck out of me. I go in. I get out, unless someone else is there to push the cart.
Now consider I was on day three of no smoking.
The book section gave me some comfort UNTIL some guy that smelled like a Camel Butt asked where I got my Wii.
“Up front“, I shrugged.
He looked toward the front,”I didn’t see any there“.
I desperately wanted to say, “Because you’re stupid“.
But I didn’t.

I walked away and selfishly gloated to myself. Mu ha ha
Originally I tried to buy our first Wii in December 07. That was an incredible waste of time. In December I also learned We was spelt Wii.
I’m thinking in March hype is over. I went to a certain place that starts with a “B” and tried to get a Wii. They looked at me like I was speaking some sorta retard talk. They always do- I think it’s the boobs and shiny lip gloss. Anyway- This is when I learn you still can’t “go get” a Wii. But if I was there on certain Wednesday’s when they received their shipments I had a pretty good shot.
This is what I found out everywhere.
I really don’t have the motivation to show up for Wii Deliveries.
So I gave up.

When Dna and Mr W, The Wii-Wachtler’s, got Wii. My Jealousy was wii-normous.
But Now! Wii Wa Wa!!! I have WII!!!

So Friday night, Ms Blither, will be running to the liquor store getting a bunch of fancy schmancy drink stuff for cocktails, a fresh box of nicorette gum, putting on the Hale Bob Sweats I found at Costco, And Wii’in all night long with Mr B

Oo Advil has kicked in and Wii-Arm is feeling Wii-onderful! Off to Play Wii Wii Wii!!

♥
Wara

PS. All hatred and evil remarks towards individuals smelling like Camel Butt is only my way of venting and dealing with not smoking. Secretly I want to rip your pants apart, light your camels on fire, and suck a few down!
But No. I will not. I am a Non-Smoker.

Quitter

Today I am a nonsmoker…

And a monstrous bitch.

My sentences are topped off with one or more of these special phrases:

“Because you’re stupid”.

“Don’t TALK TOOOOOOOO ME LIKE THAT”!!!

“What takes you so long…. *Eye Roll*”

“If you lie to me It’ll ruin your life”.

Oh there is more, but I only have so much time before I snap and need a time out.

Example #1

Me: Why isn’t the coffee ready?

Mr B: It just started.

Me: No, It’s because you’re stupid.

Clearly I made a lot of sense here. I pride myself on the ability to look stunningly sharp and witty when being a major cunt.

Example #2

Me: Where’s Tinker?

Lela: Downstairs.

Me: NO! I can hear her scratching. UGH!

Lela: Really I was down there two seconds ago. She’s downstairs.

Me: WHAT?! Did you say?!?! Don’t TALK TOOOOOOOO ME LIKE THAT!!!!

Apparently the urge of wanting an answer and being talked to was much to much for me to handle.

Example #3

Me: Where were you?

Mr B: In my truck getting my coffee cup.

Me: Uh huh. What takes you so long?…. *Eye Roll*.

Mr B: Uh. Putting the garbage can back.

Me: Were you smoking?!?! Are you hiding cigarettes?!

Mr B: *laughs*

Me: Don’t lie to me! If you lie to me It’ll ruin your Life.

My desperate desires for nicotine have begun to caused paranoid delusions.

*Sigh*

I am really glad everyone’s gone today. Really am.

I don’t feel nearly as bitchy and grumpy when I’m alone.

Everyone else pisses me off.

There is no excuses for being a brat.

Quitting shouldn’t give me a reason to act like a pompous ass.

But Fuck… GIVE ME A DAMN DAY.. to unclench my jaw and relax.
I’ve quit smoking before. I’m good at it.

I am equally as good at starting.

The smell of cigarettes disgusts me.

The cost is nothing but wasteful.

The health factor scares the color right out of my cheek and gives me nightmares of a slow slow death.

I’m a hypocrite. Always preaching how horrid smoking is and then puffing away 5 minutes later.

I am embarrassed to say I ever smoked.

NO MORE!

Now to muster up enough will power to retain my nonsmoker status forever and ever.

How dramatic am I?

Twinkle Twinkle Lil Stinker

I apologize for the picture quality. My room in so bright in the morning my camera phone can’t adjust.
Ok Ok.. I can’t adjust without squinting until my first cup of coffee is gone.
Whatever

That’s Ms Tink’s normal position for attach mode. If anyone dare approach while I’m in bed and Tink’s been able to crawl to guard dog position-> Watch OUT!
*Sigh*

Dr Woof and I had a long talk about her baditude yesterday. We’re ruling out any illnesses and she’ll call me with test results today. She already ruled out arthritis. Her dermatitis is doing great with the Atopica. Ms Tink was finally able to get her vaccines yesterday! After a year of the vet wanting to hold off due to her skin and allergy issues! Woo Hoo!! Doggy Park here we come! We’ll take them to the dog park for a good run when it’s deserted or Buster by himself, but poor Tink never gets a good good healthy run. Ms Tink thrives on walks around the neighborhood.

Next step is to call a trainer. The trainer will work with the family and Tink. Dr Woof thinks Tink’s problem is a possession issue. Tink has always been very quick to answer to treats and respond to commands for her baby carrots. She’ll do just about anything you want for a baby carrot.

Poor Buster now treats baby carrots like a Scooby snack. If he only knew about Snausages.

Next week I’ll give a jingle to a couple of the trainers and see which one will best fit us.

I remember a time when I treated my children with constant check ups, walks, and parks. Now it’s my dogs. Strange how you replace something with another… When one doesn’t need you as much.

Cheers All.. I’m off to clean up and garden this morning and then gamble the evening away!

Dr Woof

Ms Tink is going to see Dr Woof for her check today.

We’ll be doing a serious discussion on her temper. Over the past two years her attitude has increased to a raging bitch. The last two days I have felt like my dog may have some how absorbed some of my bipolar qualities. Unfortunately for her I don’t think she gets therapy or mood stabilizers.

Poor Buster and Mr B get the worst of her dark side. In the past two days Mr B has taken on 2 Tinker attacks and Buster 1. Even I was growled at over a spot on the couch- This was a first- Usually I am the cause of her outburst because she doesn’t want to share. We tested her with Drew, my son, and had him come in my room while I was laying on my bed. She went after him with a vengeance. *Sigh* On Tuesday nights walk she went after a man who was happily saying Hello to Mr Buster and Mr B. All other times she is a cuddle bug, who can’t get enough love.

Ms Tink has had so many problems. Poor Thing.

I don’t know.

I feel so confused with her.

HNT- Another Paradise

Hola!

Happy HNT

Thank you Mr Jerry for another wonderful touch up!

And the Original…

For all you need to know to play HNT:

http://osbasso.blogspot.com/

Ahh Monday!

Mr B and I had a free and relaxing weekend.

We leisurely worked on the back yard, sipped lemonade, lounged around, and even went out twice.

Saturday we spent hours watching the birds while we soaked up the UV rays and threatened to toss each other into the pool.

Bird watching is a love my parents passed on to me. Mr B’s grandmother is also an avid bird watcher.

Except we don’t actually know the names of the birdies. Every bird we see is either a Lil Brown Guy, Lil Red Guy, Lil Gray Guy, Medium Black One, Or Hawaiian Dove. FYI- An Hawaiian Dove is a Pigeon. It’s a joke we have with my Dad. While in Hawaii he thought a bunch of white pigeon’s were doves… He’d say, “Did you see all the Doves”? I could never figure out where they were. Finally I asked if he meant the pigeons. You kinda had to be there to find it really funny.

My Mother only believes there are two kinda of birds here in Vegas.

My Sister, DnaDbl, believes there are more than that, but sooner or later they are all gonna be flaming balls of fire soaring through the sky so it doesn’t matter.

Sunday we decided we’d turn the bush outside our kitchen window into an orange “bush”.
Mm Hmm. That’s Right…
Fake oranges

We also bought Buster, the Rottweiler, a new bed.

For some reason Ms Tinker thinks it’s hers… Everything seems to be hers.

Ahh.. And now it’s Monday and I’m going to pick up the house, put on my Bikini, and enjoy the day.

It’s suppose to be 92 and Sunny.

Cheers!